The Paris Airport Ordeal

My recent ordeal in the Paris Airport just earned them a place on my no-fly list.

Charles De Gaulle airport is problematic because it and Amsterdam are usually the first places direct flights from the US land. So, most of my flights to Europe go through one of those 2 places. Honestly, I avoid Paris first because of the many situations I have had there that were so unpleasant. Schipol Airport in Amsterdam can be very crowded with long lines but the lines usually move along and the workers are organized with options for those who are trying to get to flights that are leaving soon. Paris, on the other hand is a crap show. First, the apathy of the workers there is shocking - like you could drop dead in a queue and they would just grab your arm and drag you to the side with annoyance because now they will have to deal with your dead body. The only time I see workers there hustle is when they are leaving their shift. I know the "stereotype" of French people is one of rudeness and I generally don't find that to be true anywhere EXCEPT Charles De Gaulle airport. The rudeness and apathy are NEXT LEVEL there. I almost missed a flight home once because AT THE GATE as I was boarding, they pulled me, a bunch of people in wheelchairs a few mothers with small children aside for extra screening. I was last and they were SLOW. The crew was threatening to close the door and leave me and the security staff continued on like the sloths in the DMV scene in Zootopia. As soon as I got on the plane, the flight attendant shut the door. They literally didn't care if I missed my flight. It was all I could do to not have a meltdown at them while they casually picked through my carryon and then dumped it on the table for me to repack. Then we had the most hilarious trip ever - you can read about it HERE at my Send Me to London Facebook page.

So, this year, SAS joined Skyteam with Delta and this was the first time we experienced this partnership as we were heading to Copenhagen last month (check my FB page for Denmark Travel Inspo - Denmark should be on your travel list!). Generally, I know that you need AT LEAST 2 hours at CDG to transfer flights - 3 is better. Delta gave us 2 hours and 15 minutes so I KNEW it was tight, but trusted it would be okay. Little did we know that SAS leaves from a different terminal that was so close, yet so far away and all the problems that would cause based on the inter-terminal travel we would be required to do. Since we were flying Delta One and my husband is a Diamond, if we had been LEAVING for the US on Delta, we most likely would have gotten special services that would have avoided this mess but because Delta was dumping us in Paris and we were connecting to SAS, there was nothing for us. So, this is how it went down. We actually landed a little early and thought, "Piece of cake". Got off the plane and went through passport control - which was expected since it was our first touch-down in Europe. No problem. Luggage was checked through. Went through passport control and headed to the shuttle to Terminal 2 only to find out we had to go through security FIRST before getting on the shuttle - carryon checked, slow lines, apathetic workers. Waited TOO LONG for the shuttle with the worker there refusing to give us an ETA on the shuttle. It finally arrived about 20 minutes later and then sat for an additional 10 minutes. Okay, we are tight but fine. Shuttle takes about 10 minutes to get to a stop where everyone has to get off and only then we realized we had to get on ANOTHER shuttle from there and it WASN'T our terminal.

Now we have about 45 minutes. The workers there shrugged when we told them that and said, "You just have to wait." There was a map on the wall with timings between stops with a loop of nearly 15 minutes out to Terminal 1. We start doing the math. We need to get to Terminal 2D (the literal last stop on this bus from Hell) and the bus started at Terminal 2F. The math is not really working now. Plus, every time the bus stops, it stays for like 5 minutes and we watch people literally stroll to the bus and slowly get on. At one point, we were waving at a family to HURRY UP as the bus was clearly trying to leave and they acted like they had all the time in the world.

When we get to Terminal 2D and realized even though there was no walking route between 2F and 2D, it would have been better to have left the Terminal and gotten a taxi to 2D. It would have literally taken 5 minutes. I mean, the trip out to Terminal 1 was weird and brutal. It was SO FAR from the rest of the airport and not a single person go on or off the bus. It almost looked lie a ghost town - not sure why a separate bus didn't go out there. It was wasted time.

We finally get to 2D and Mark takes off trying to get to the flight and see if they will hold it for us. We had to go through passport control AND security TWO MORE TIMES - every time we went through a door, we were faced with security. It was madness for a transfer. And, of course, when we said we were going to miss our flight, we were met with a shrug. Mark finally took off running - we had like 10 minutes until the SAS flight left. Mark got through the final security check for boarding passes (because the flight hadn't left, yet) only to find out the gate was at the far end of the long terminal. My husband is a runner and had his heavy backpack and a carryon and he was running and literally sweating through his jeans (because airflow there isn't a thing - let alone air conditioning). He got to the gate 11 minutes after the doors were closed. The jetway was pulled and the plane was starting to move. I am NOT a runner but was walking as fast as I could. I couldn't get past the boarding pass check gates because, by then, it showed my flight had already left. So, he was stuck airside and I was stuck in the terminal without a boarding pass. So, now the fight to get someone to care began. He finally got an agent at the gate to find us seats on the flight in 2 hours. But he had to get mad at them to get them to do it. They had no intention of helping. But, the flight wasn't showing up for me so I couldn't access a boarding pass to get into the secure area. He couldn't leave airside for fear we'd BOTH be stuck. So, I went to the SAS check-in TWICE only to be told TWICE that they were not going to help me. I finally lost it and told one guy that he was the most unhelpful and rudest human I had ever dealt with. He literally looked at me and pointed away from the desk without a word. I find a supervisor and was told that I could go to Delta which was in the TERMINAL WE STARTED FROM so I could get caught in bus Hell again if I wanted to get Delta to help. Nope. They were probably just going to be rude and unhelpful also.

Finally, the flight showed up in my app but without a boarding pass, so I got back in line at SAS to get a boarding pass like I assumed I could at this point - I was on the flight and had an assigned seat. Nope. Denied again. He pointed to another man who DID print me out a card so I could get into the airside area. The terminal is hot and I am the grossest, sweatiest, angriest mess I have ever been. All I can keep thinking is that I'm glad this was ME and not clients. I was nearly in tears from being so angry and exhausted. I mean, we just got off an international flight so I wasn't exactly feeling my best anyway. I finally got through the airside and met my husband. We were able to get on the flight which was then about 90 minutes later. To top it all off, the meal on the flight was gross, chewy and slimy smoked salmon with half-cooked potato salad. It was icing on the crap cake CDG had served us for the last 4 hours.

Charles De Gaulle airport is now to be avoided at all costs for transfers. If I had known that the SAS terminal was SO FAR (via bus) from where Delta landed, I wouldn't have booked that flight. And, shame on Delta Airlines for thinking anyone could make it. IF we had been wearing rocket shoes and had a time machine, we couldn't have made that flight. We did EVERYTHING MORE than correctly - even from getting off the plane nearly first because we had flown Delta One. We hustled through all the checkpoints and jumped on and off the buses as quickly as possible. It was an impossible action and I'm going to make sure Delta knows that.

The ultimate irony was that my husband became a Delta Million Miler about a quarter of the way into the flight. The crew signed a card congratulating him for it and thanking him for being a loyal Delta customer.

Unfortunately, I already have a flight booked from CDG in December at the end of my Christmas Market river cruise I'm taking a group on. Luckily, we're just leaving from there and not transferring through. But, from now on, Schipol in Amsterdam wins for me. I'm done with the crap show that is Charles De Gaulle Airport in Paris.

They COULD offer better customer service but they don't want to. And, I suspect if you required it, they would all go on strike. I find it odd that the airlines - who are certainly being required to pay heavy taxes to the airport - don't demand better service for their fliers through CDG. In the world of travel agents, the sentiments about Charles De Gaulle airport are largely the same. It's the worst airport in Europe.